This week I have seen a common theme running through various Facebook groups for VAs.

Well, I see it quite often but for some reason this week it really became noticeable on several groups.

It's about personal versus business. The whole concept.

One of the things I have learned in my business life is that most men handle business decisions VERY differently than most women do.

Most men treat their business like a business. They make decisions for the good of the business, not because they think people will like them better or because they think that people will judge them for making a hard decision.

Most women tend to treat their business as their pet project, or even as extension of their very personality (My business is ME). They are passionate and driven around the very thought of having created their business.

So what? You are saying. I hear you...

But here's the thing. Business is business. It's not personal.

It can be personal to you. It is your ideas, your creativity, your decision making - that all drive your business.

In these groups I see women getting offended if someone doesn't like their business practices: a VA commented in a VA group that a potential client friended her on Facebook and then the client noticed she was expecting a baby, and told her she would prefer to work with someone else since the VA would be too busy soon. Some group members pointed out that the VA should be careful using her personal profile for business, due to Facebook TOS. The VA was wholly offended, was rude to those who suggested it, and left the group. She was also offended by the client saying she would find help elsewhere. It's fine to be upset about these things, but don't let them affect your business, is all I'm saying. It's not personal, it's business!

I have seen women respond to posts about annoying clients with cheek and verve. Another VA had a problem with a client who wanted to lower his retainer for several months because he had no money to pay her. She got spanked by the VAs in the group for putting all of her eggs in one basket. But again, that wasn't the issue. The VA was asking for business help. The answer should have been how to put boundaries and policies in place. Using your personal opinion to help someone is also taking things personally. By responding as such, you are projecting your opinion on the other person's business, which is not necessary. It's not personal, it's business!

I also see women responding to others' bad customer service stories with an 'I'll never shop there because of your experience, and I'll tell everyone else not to either!' Well whoever would not purchase something from a business owner because of someone else's personal experience has not made a sound business decision at all. To me, it looks silly and very unprofessional to rant and rave on social media for no good reason - about anything! These customer service stories make me laugh out loud most of the time. You weren't there! Use your own experiences to make your own decisions! It's not personal, it's business!

I'm not saying there can't be solidarity, but seriously... step back and take the emotion out of it! Make good, sound business decisions based on fact and logic.

Personal feelings hardly get in the way where men make decisions. I know they aren't as evolved as women LOL but really if you want to fly in business, the cattiness has to be put aside. The personal hurt and anguish needs to be kept in check. And the decisions you need to make need to have pros and cons weighed for them to be effective.

Make good decisions, based on what you want in your business. Stand by those decisions because they are made with your head, not your heart. Get input where you need it but make sure the input you are asking for isn't just from your best friend.

And the sooner you adopt this practice, the more success you will see for yourself.

Honest!

Tracey D'Aviero is a veteran VA and Founder of Your VA Mentor. Tracey trains and mentors professional women and men who are brand new to the VA industry or who have been struggling to make their business successful. Her mission is to educate professionals on how to build and grow successful and profitable virtual businesses in the VA industry by implementing systems and smart principles. To get information about Tracey's upcoming programs and free resources, 

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