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This week I have seen a common theme running through various Facebook groups for VAs.

Well, I see it quite often but for some reason this week it really became noticeable on several groups.

It's about personal versus business. The whole concept.

One of the things I have learned in my business life is that most men handle business decisions VERY differently than most women do.

Most men treat their business like a business. They make decisions for the good of the business, not because they think people will like them better or because they think that people will judge them for making a hard decision.

Most women tend to treat their business as their pet project, or even as extension of their very personality (My business is ME). They are passionate and driven around the very thought of having created their business.

So what? You are saying. I hear you...

But here's the thing. Business is business. It's not personal.

It can be personal to you. It is your ideas, your creativity, your decision making - that all drive your business.

In these groups I see women getting offended if someone doesn't like their business practices: a VA commented in a VA group that a potential client friended her on Facebook and then the client noticed she was expecting a baby, and told her she would prefer to work with someone else since the VA would be too busy soon. Some group members pointed out that the VA should be careful using her personal profile for business, due to Facebook TOS. The VA was wholly offended, was rude to those who suggested it, and left the group. She was also offended by the client saying she would find help elsewhere. It's fine to be upset about these things, but don't let them affect your business, is all I'm saying. It's not personal, it's business!

I have seen women respond to posts about annoying clients with cheek and verve. Another VA had a problem with a client who wanted to lower his retainer for several months because he had no money to pay her. She got spanked by the VAs in the group for putting all of her eggs in one basket. But again, that wasn't the issue. The VA was asking for business help. The answer should have been how to put boundaries and policies in place. Using your personal opinion to help someone is also taking things personally. By responding as such, you are projecting your opinion on the other person's business, which is not necessary. It's not personal, it's business!

I also see women responding to others' bad customer service stories with an 'I'll never shop there because of your experience, and I'll tell everyone else not to either!' Well whoever would not purchase something from a business owner because of someone else's personal experience has not made a sound business decision at all. To me, it looks silly and very unprofessional to rant and rave on social media for no good reason - about anything! These customer service stories make me laugh out loud most of the time. You weren't there! Use your own experiences to make your own decisions! It's not personal, it's business!

I'm not saying there can't be solidarity, but seriously... step back and take the emotion out of it! Make good, sound business decisions based on fact and logic.

Personal feelings hardly get in the way where men make decisions. I know they aren't as evolved as women LOL but really if you want to fly in business, the cattiness has to be put aside. The personal hurt and anguish needs to be kept in check. And the decisions you need to make need to have pros and cons weighed for them to be effective.

Make good decisions, based on what you want in your business. Stand by those decisions because they are made with your head, not your heart. Get input where you need it but make sure the input you are asking for isn't just from your best friend.

And the sooner you adopt this practice, the more success you will see for yourself.

Honest!

Tracey D'Aviero is a veteran VA and Founder of Your VA Mentor. Tracey trains and mentors professional women and men who are brand new to the VA industry or who have been struggling to make their business successful. Her mission is to educate professionals on how to build and grow successful and profitable virtual businesses in the VA industry by implementing systems and smart principles. To get information about Tracey's upcoming programs and free resources, 

Here's a tip to help you make the most of your marketing plan/writing schedule for the week.

This tip is simple, and if you follow it, you'll see results fairly quickly. Here it is.

Every day, look at your marketing plan and - Do the most important stuff FIRST!

So What is the Important Stuff?

The important stuff is the stuff that has the potential to bring in some immediate (or nearly immediate) income! It also has the potential to create a list of steady clients and customers for you.

It's stuff like searching online job boards every morning with the intention of finding at least three jobs to apply for, then applying for those three jobs right away.

It's stuff like writing and submitting queries to publications you wish to write for. Sending out a single query every now and then won't cut it. You need to be constantly creating new queries and getting them out to editors, publishers, etc. - so work on a new query every morning (or at least once a week) BEFORE you post to your blog or visit other blogs to make comments.

The important stuff also includes sending out an LOI (letter of introduction) to several businesses you would like to have as clients or editors you would like to work with. Again, this activity gives you a much better change of attracting immediate clients and assignments than say writing a blog post does, so make sure this activity has priority on your daily to-do list.

What to Do Next

Once you've done the most important stuff FIRST each day, then move on to creating new content for your site(s). Write a blog post or create new articles for your newsletter. Also, take time to create more of your own products to sell and make sure you have a plan for marketing these products.

Finally, move on to the social networking stuff on your plan. Stuff like tweeting, posting to Facebook, or reading other blogs and leaving comments. These items are important, too. But they are NOT the MOST important items on your plan because more than likely they won't produce immediate income.

Once you begin to do the important stuff first - on a regular basis - you'll start to see your freelancing income double, maybe even triple. You'll also be more systematic in the way you market your business, and that will help you be more successful, too.

Try it!

Whether you are out of your office for a vacation, business trip, local shopping, visits with family or friends, or going for a walk around the block, do you notice ideas often surface that you struggle to intentionally access when sitting in front of your computer for a predefined writing session? If so, you are not alone in that experience. What do you do to capture the ideas, much less to honor them?

There is a rhythm, a flow that occurs when you are in motion and in a different environment. It's not uncommon to hear someone comment about getting some of their best ideas in the shower or in the middle of the night when sleeping. Maybe you have said such things yourself.

While there are certainly physiological and psychological reasons this happens, take a practical and simple approach to make the most of all of that. You may think you'll remember it later. Even if you do, why not make it easy to open up space for more ideas to come to mind by recording the current idea now rather than risking it evaporating or struggling to remember it later?

Yes, your bite size brilliance comes to mind when you are out and about physically, mentally, or both. Accept that for what it is - brilliance that warrants your attention. Then capture it -- now.

1. Capture the raw unpolished seed of the idea the soonest moment you can. All you need is just enough so it will trigger your thinking later when you are ready to refine and embellish it.

2. Use whatever method or methods that are immediately available to you. That can be anything from recording the tidbit by voice or as a text or a note on your smart phone to jotting something down on a torn snippet of paper in your purse or pocket.

3. Have hard copy and digital recording methods easily accessible so you don't have to hunt for something when an idea comes to mind. A writing instrument and a small pad of paper in each room of your home or office (yes EACH room), in your car, in your back pack, or anything else you carry becomes an ideal back-up if your cell phone ran out of battery power or is otherwise unavailable.

4. Centralize the random ideas into a folder on your computer as soon as possible.The audio messages need to be transcribed so you can shape and manage all the information from your various sources when you're ready.

5. Shape the information into how-to tips and then into categories. You are well on the way to finishing a document that can be sold, shared, or both. An introduction, some information about your background, and contact information for reaching you complete the manuscript.

ACTION - Notice the wealth of ideas that come to you when you are not sitting at your desk. Move around, especially when you are feeling stuck, bored, or uninspired. Regardless of your power of concentration, your innate level of diligence, or even a deadline you may be on, you will accomplish more by mixing things up in your physical and psychological environment.

© 2015

Paulette Ensign, Tips Products International Founder, never dreamed of selling a million+ copies of her 16-page tips booklet 110 Ideas for Organizing Your Business Life, much less in four languages and various formats without a penny on advertising. She's made a handsome living and cross-country move from New York to San Diego recycling those same 3500 words since 1991. With over forty years' experience worldwide with small businesses, corporations, and professional associations in numerous industries, she and her cat live a mile from the beach, keeping them both young at heart. 

Have you ever noticed what it is that draws you into an article, book, blog post, booklet, or anything else you're reading? Yes, the content is certainly a key part of what attracts you. The overall style or tone of the writer is another part that keeps you reading. There is still something else you may never have considered, something that can feel like an annoying pebble in your shoe without ever realizing exactly what it is that's somehow off the mark, unsettling, and even annoying.

That one thing triggering your reaction can be that the writer is mixing it up in talking about themselves, talking to you, and then talking about something that is neither you nor them. They are confusing you in the process of all of that.

When you are writing, these are among the possibilities where your focus is going, intentionally or unintentionally.

All About You

Talking about "I," "my," "me," and "mine" serves a limited purpose, Your reader expects your experience to be the basis of the information you are sharing with them, so all that self focus is unnecessary within the information you are sharing with them. When you talk about "we" or "us," you are being presumptuous in including them in your statement. You may feel you are using that as a way to draw in your readers. Still, your choice in doing that is often counterproductive and more divisive than inclusive.

All About Someone Else

Using examples of "them" can be helpful. Those examples can be even more helpful when you bring the example clearly back around to directly referencing your reader and their situation. There are ways to make that connection so you still use the example of someone else.

All About Your Reader

Talking to your reader with generous use of "you" and "yours" is the magnet to draw your readers into what you are sharing with them. You can personalize your presentation so it becomes a conversation between you and your reader. You may have a proven system that you know will solve their concerns. That is what is important to them, that you have something that solves their problem. The difference between "you will experience the results you want from a proven system" and "I have a proven system I use with my clients" is a subtle and powerful difference.

The most unnerving, unsettling, and confusing of all is when you mix up your writing to have all of those targets within the same publication, writing about you, them, and someone else. Your reader may not know exactly what is causing their negative reaction to your otherwise brilliant information. However, their reaction may ultimately send them away from you instead of toward you.

ACTION - Review your writing to see how much and how consistently you are talking TO your reader. You may not have ever noticed or even thought about this before you read this article, or this might be a great reminder to you of something you learned when you were first considering creating a product from your bite size brilliance. Talking TO your reader is one of the easiest and quickest ways to deepen your relationship with whoever reads or hears anything you share with people who are eager to learn from you.

© 2015

Paulette Ensign, Tips Products International Founder, never dreamed of selling a million+ copies of her 16-page tips booklet 110 Ideas for Organizing Your Business Life, much less in four languages and various formats without a penny on advertising. She's made a handsome living and cross-country move from New York to San Diego recycling those same 3500 words since 1991. With over forty years' experience worldwide with small businesses, corporations, and professional associations in numerous industries, she lives a mile from the beach, keeping her young at heart.